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Mind Searching For Me?

by Kaeru Dawn

/
1.
From the forest to the city, to the mountains by the sea To the canyon and the valley - have you seen a guy called me? I've been searching all the corners and haven't found him yet Maybe he's looking too, maybe we've already met When we catch each other up I've got a piece of mind for him He's got the other piece for me - we can trade and start again I'm writing a diary from the perspective of a tree It's not what it sounds like - It's symbolic It means a lot to me - It's symbolic From the forest to the city, to the mountains by the sea To the canyon and the valley - have you seen a guy called me? I've been searching all the corners and haven't found him yet Maybe he's looking too, maybe we've already met When we catch each other up I've got a piece of mind for him He's got the other piece for me - we can trade and start again But what if he was here the whole time next to me? Would it be a waste of time to be searching endlessly? Would it be a waste of time in my destiny to search and search and never find the other piece of my mind. Who could have it if it's not right here? Well if it is it isn't clear..
2.
I always sing about trees and death and things And about my mother I sing a lot of songs about my feelings for my lover I write a lot of songs about freedom and the road And right now I'm singing about everything I know And everything I know amounts to nothing - It's worth nothing at all Everything I have seen means nothing at all All of my experiences don't mean much to you But who am I talking to? There's no one here but me.. I'm on my own in this moment and I can see That sometimes I'm alone in moments that they are here with me Who are they, are they the common people? Who are they, are they religious people? Who are they, are they working people? Who are they, are they normal people? Who are they, are they real people? Who are they, imaginary people? I'd like to say that I can't tell what's real anymore But that wouldn't be quite true That would insinuate that I have lost my mind And I haven't quite yet - but if you find it, could you let me know?
3.
I know that I'm in control I know that I'm powerful I know that it's up to me Then why do I make these choices? Why do I make these choices? What is it that tantalises me to play in the shadows and live life for free What is it that compels me to make the same mistakes again and again I must be crazy I must be nuts I must be insane I must not know what's what But I just strut I just strut But look at the way you walk sometimes, it doesn't match the way you talk sometimes Look at the way you walk sometimes, it doesn't match the way you walk sometimes Look at yourself, look at yourself Look at the choices that you made Look at yourself, look at yourself Look at the way that you behave I know you don't want to but you got to face it I know you don't want to but you got to embrace it I know you don't want to - but it's part of you Do you want to let go of that part and make room for another part? Or do you just want to hold on to it until it's so big that it doesn't fit Do you just want to hold on to it, just hold on to it. But what are you holding on to, it is hurting you And I hate to see you hurting, I hate it so much I hate to see you hurting, I just want to touch you and make you feel good and make you feel pretty and make you feel alive Alive And I don't want to put you in the naughty corner cause I know it's not your fault I see that you do the best you can to do just what you're told But you are told so many things, where do you begin? You are told so many things, oh where oh where oh where to begin.. And what if some of those things contradict each other? What if some of those things don't make sense? What if those things are dangerous, what if those things will hurt you Would you do them anyway just because they told you to Would you jump off of that cliff, just because I did? Would you jump off that cliff, just because I did tell you that you have to. Oh I told you that you have to. When I told you that you have to, I didn't really mean it I didn't really mean it You are free to do what you want to do Do as thou wilt shall be the law Do as thou wilt shall be the law that you abide by That you abide by And you can have whatever you want now as long as it doesn't hurt others But don't listen to me. No don't listen to me. Just listen to the wind And the birds when they sing And the crickets chirping And the sound of the waves as they crash and pull away And the sound of the waves as they Crash and Pull Away
4.
What is this cave I'm sitting in? There's so many walls Not enough light coming from outside Everything is artificial Nothing in here is real Nothing in here is wonderful Nothing makes me feel Like I want to do anything or get outside and live life I just want to sit in my room and close the curtains and sleep It's the most uninspiring environment that I could ever find myself in ..But here i am creating Oh what is it about uncomfortableness that makes me be my best, that makes me do more? What is it about feeling unsatisfied that makes me want to satisfy my hunger? What is it about seeing what is wrong and wanting to be part of the solution? Not the problem But that's the problem - I AM! I am part of the problem And so are you - yeah so are you - yes you are - don't lie to yourself anymore You are part of it and more You are here to explore but you've been stuck inside an artificial cave With no natural lighting and nothing exciting could happen any time soon Even if it did you would look the other way Change the channel, change the station just do whatever it takes to ignore what you know To Ignore what is wrong To ignore the fact we destroy the planet we are from Why would you treat your home like that? Why would you put up those walls? Between you and your neighbour Why would you want to live inside anyway? You can't feel the air, you can't feel the Sun, you can't feel the Earth, you can't see everyone You're alone, isolated, alienated on your own Lonely, lonely, lonesome loner sitting in a cave With your artificial gadgets - isn't that great? You lonely, lonely loner in that artificial cave with your artificial gadgets Isn't that just great? Now you can say distracted, stay in denial You can stay repressing your feelings for a while We'll see how long it lasts then. We'll see how long it lasts. We'll see how long you can keep it up, See how long before you blow up Ooooh - You know you will
5.
Life is beautiful, Love is beautiful Death is beautiful and your breath is beautiful Oh everything is beautiful You are beautiful, I am beautiful Oh we are beautiful and our love is beautiful The world is beautiful oh the world is beautiful Oh everything is beautiful Birth is beautiful, the Earth is beautiful Nature's beautiful - chaos beautiful Consistency is beautiful and spontaneity is such a beauty. Oh it's such a beauty Everything is beautiful Pain is beautiful, pleasure is beautiful Fears are beautiful, hopes are beautiful Desires are beautiful and all your dreams are beautiful All your skin is beautiful and all your hair is beautiful All your flaws are beautiful, all your perfections beautiful Everything is beautiful The fire is beautiful, the water is beautiful, the air is beautiful, the plants are beautiful The rocks are beautiful, the mud is beautiful, the swamp is beautiful, the flowers are so beautiful Oh everything is beautiful All these sounds are beautiful, all these smells are beautiful, all these senses are beautiful The physical world is beautiful, The spiritual is beautiful, The mental world is beautiful

about

Mind Searching For Me?

Is a collection of songs that speak of the eternal dance of losing and finding our minds.

It touches on mania, depression, creativity, self driven destruction and self driven determination.

The relationship between sanity and craziness and the creative potential they both hold.

All of these songs were recorded freestyle without any preparation, writing or composition - except for "Piece Of Mind" which had been mostly written down before recording.
That means that all of these words, melodies and feelings came directly from my twisted mind and into the microphone - unfiltered and unashamed.

credits

released October 8, 2016

I'd like to thank my Bi-Polar order - for giving me the inconsistent mind necessary to experience such rich, emotional depths.

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about

Kaeru Dawn Portland, Oregon

Independent and experimental musical artist from Australia.

From raw recordings of original folk music, captured alone in a rainforest..
..all the way to Hi-Fi electronic productions fit for any jungle dance floor.

I put it all here first.

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